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http://www-ltaaa-com.xinglongtex.com/translation.html

-------------译者:C先生-审核者:hht288------------



Early on in a relationship both partners put their best foot forward showing off the most pleasant polished versions of themselves.

在一段恋爱的早期阶段,双方都会将自己最好的一面展现出来,向对方展示出最令人愉悦、最优雅的自己。

Then time passes they grow more and more comfortable with each other eventually get married and things well they change.

随着时间的流逝,他们(彼此间的相处)变得越来越舒适,最终结婚了,然后一切都变了。

Below we’ve gathered 17 tweets that hilariously highlight the difference between dating and marriage. 

下面,我们总汇了17条推文,这些推文生动幽默地呈现出恋爱约会和步入婚姻二者之间的区别。

1.How people walk when they’re:
DATING *holding hands*
ENGAGED *arms locked*
MARRIED *one person is 5 feet in front of the other and yelling back at them for parking so far away*

1.人们在不同阶段时是怎么走路的?
恋爱约会时:手牵着手
订婚时:紧紧锁住对方的手臂
步入婚姻:一个人走在另一个人前5英尺处,然后对离自己太远的对方大喊大叫。

2.
dating: its cute that you dont eat all the chicken off a wing
marriage: there’s like $1.75 worth of chicken left on those bones meghan

恋爱约会:你没吃干净鸡翅上的肉是可爱的。
步入婚姻:梅根,你骨头上没吃净剩下的鸡肉大概值1.75美元。

3.
10 days into dating: [hides every imperfection]
10 years into marriage: "Look at this zit brewing!" "The one on my back puts that to SHAME."

恋爱约会10天:(隐藏自己身上的每一处瑕疵)
步入婚姻10年:“看看(我)这颗正在酝酿即将喷发的青春痘!”“跟我背上的那颗痘比起来简直是小巫见大巫。”

4.
Texting my wife when we were dating - What are you wearing?
Texting my wife now - Did the dog poop?

约会阶段时我会给妻子发这样的短信——你(现在)穿的是什么?
现在我给妻子发的短信是这样的——咱家狗大便过了吗?

5.
When you're dating you message your partner about sex & fun date ideas. When you're married it's about breakfast cereal iron content.

当你在约会的时候,你会发消息告诉你的伴侣关于性和有趣的约会想法。当你结婚的时候,发的信息是早餐麦片(有多少)铁含量的。

6.
When we were dating my husband crafted a multi-CD playlist for my "Day the Music Died" party now I get excited if he texts me back "sure.

当我们在约会的时候,我的丈夫为我的“音乐死去之日”派对精心制作了一个双面光盘播放列表,现在只要他回复我“当然(可以)”我就会很兴奋。

7.
Crush: I hope he notices me
Dating: I hope he notices my new dress
Married: DOES ANYONE ELSE NOTICE THE HAIR ALL OVER THE BATHROOM?

迷恋期:我希望他能注意到我。
恋爱约会:我希望他能注意我(穿了)新裙子。
步入婚姻:难道没人注意到浴室里满地头发吗?

8.
If you're dating and get an "I love you" text for no reason it's endearing.
If you're married you wonder why he has a guilty conscience.

如果是约会阶段,不需要什么理由你就会收到“我爱你”的短信,这很讨人喜欢。
如果你结婚了,你会纳闷他是不是内心有愧才这么做。

 -------------译者:龙腾翻译总管-审核者:龙腾翻译总管------------

9.
2nd month dating: A thousand lifetimes with you would not be enough.
2nd month of marriage: OMG you are the loudest cereal chewer on earth!

恋爱约会第2个月:和你在一起千年的时间我都嫌不够。
步入婚姻第2个月:天哪,你是地球上咀嚼麦片声音最吵的人类!

10.
TEXTS WHILE DATING: can't wait to see you later i bought cute new panties
TEXTS WHILE MARRIED: omg there's this sweaty ass smell in the kitchen and I don't know what it is thoughts?

恋爱约会时会这么发短信:迫不及待想见到你了,我新买了些可爱的小裤裤哦。
步入婚姻后会这么发短信:我的天啊,厨房里有股汗臭味,我不知道这是谁整的,对此你有啥想说的吗?

11.
Friday nights...
Single: I'm going to the bar!
Dating: Wanna go to the bar?
Married: Can I go to the bar?
Married w/ Kids: Pottery Barn?

周五晚上……
单身时:今晚我要去酒吧嗨!
约会时:今晚想一起去酒吧玩吗?
已婚时:今晚我可以去酒吧玩吗?
已婚有孩子时:去陶瓷谷仓(买家具)吗?

12.
Dating: I could never stay mad at you.
Marriage: It's been 3 weeks and we still aren't speaking over a fight about a laundry basket.

恋爱约会:我永远不会生你的气。
步入婚姻:为了洗衣篮(问题)吵架,我们已经3个星期没说话了。

13.
When dating: It's so cute how you never knows where your keys are!
After marriage: The key hook is right HERE. Use it. You're killing me.

恋爱约会时:你总是不知道自己的钥匙在哪,你真可爱!
步入婚姻后:放钥匙的挂钩就在这里。好好用它。你蠢得让我想死的心都有了。

14.
Remember when he used to hold it in when you were dating but now that you're married he just answers with a fart?

还记得在你们约会的时候他会(把屁)憋住,但现在你们结婚了,他会放个屁来回答你?

15.
Massage when you begin dating: Sensual with lotion for an hour
Married massage: 1 hand mostly knuckles during commercials on your birthday

当你开始约会的时候,用护肤液为你情色身体按摩整整一个小时。
已婚时的按摩则是,在你生日那天,在广告时一只手老是在打响指。

16.
Dating sex: dinner compliments attentive conversation foreplay 
Married sex: "When I'm outta the bathroom let's get naked."

恋爱约会时的性生活:共度一顿浪漫晚餐、赞美、殷勤的交谈和前戏。
步入婚姻时的性生活:“当我走出浴室的时候,让我们一起来脱光光吧。”

17.
*dating*
Send me a pic.
*marriage*
Send me a pic 
of the tile you like.

恋爱约会时:发给我一张(你性感诱人的)照片。
步入婚姻:发给我一张......................................你喜欢的瓷砖的照片。